I work full time, 6 days a week. I’m not a single mom, I have a husband who’s working too and we help each other with the finances. I chose to work outside the home because it is the only option for us right now although I dream of someday, be able to work from home and tend to the needs of my child (future children) and generating income on the side by doing so. Wouldn’t that be perfect? Earning while staying at home?

The company I am working for has more than 80,000 employees with only around 800 female population. In this time of global crisis and recession, there had been lots of cost cutting  programs going on: turning off lights during lunch break, reduction of printing and paper use, using mug cups instead of disposable paper cups, etc, etc.

Their next move? They want to cut down on the already minority female employee population. The reason they say or rumors say, is that working women have “issues” like kids can get sick, being absent because of painful menstrual periods, attending parent-teacher meetings, pregnancy, childbirth and others. If you are a mom, you know what I am trying to convey. For the past two years since working here, I’ve had family emergencies, I have brought my kid to office because the caretaker is sick and I have taken off due to painful monthly sickness so I am a very qualified candidate for the employee cutdown. I don’t know what’s ahead and all I can do is hope for the best.

I am sure I am not alone in this boat, there are hundreds and hundreds of women being sacked off their job due to the “issues”. Will this wicked corporate mentality go on and on, generation after generation? This is not the 50’s and I thought times have changed. So much for companies declaring they’re an “equal opportunity employer”.

My husband’s got the flu and when he’s got it, he turns into a whiny, lazy creature that I truly hate. You see, no matter how light the symptoms are, he turns them into a man flu. Haven’t heard of man flu? Well, it’s a type of flu where the victim looks and vouches they’re almost dying when in truth one paracetamol solves the problem.

He wasn’t able to do anything for two consecutive weekends now - wasn’t to do anything AT HOME. On week days, he works like usual but when Friday comes (our weekend), he couldn’t get up until 12 noon and I’d have to take the babe out of the house so she’ll not sue me of making her a prisoner. She needs some sun also.

Two consecutive weekends and it’s just me and the babe going out for groceries or to the park. The man flu sufferer stays at home either sleeping or spending time in front of the PC. Lovely life!

Now, I feel he has passed me the bug. And am I qualified to laze around and not do anything? I doubt it!

Last weekend I had a very beautiful realization: I am lucky I have a daughter. Now, no offense to moms having sons because I can only speak for myself here, having only one child who happens to have the same gender as I do.

Pristine and I went out. Just the two of us. First stop was Toys R’ Us, on her request. She likes to roam around that wide space of toys, pushing buttons here and there, coming into small play houses. Except for a pair of pajamas that was on sale at half the price, we didn’t buy anything (toy related) but enjoyed our time there. Next, we went to the nearby mall that had a huge sale of items men would not waste time with. Think girl bags, accessories, feathery pens, pink pads, glitzy shoes and all other doo dads. We spent a whole hour there! She would show me an item and we’ll both say, “ooooh, how cuuuute” or “niiiice”. This kind of time wasting activity would never happen had we taken along the male member of our family (duh my ever practical husband)!

I bought her a pencil case and a purple feathery pen, again at less than half the original prices and we went on to have a snack. We giggled, laughed and talked about when we’ll do this next time!

Pristine is just five. As we drove home, I looked at her sitting beside me and thought of the endless possibilities of future girly dates and bondings we will have. Something like, when I am in my 40’s, I’ll call her from her office at lunch and say, “Let’s have lunch today” or “There’s a sale, let’s go!”

My future is bright and happy.

I came back home today after spending two hours at the office because of abdominal and back pains due to a very painful monthly period. I’d be candid here, since I think not many people read this blog except family and close friends.

I’m a little disappointed to know that I am not pregnant. We were trying for a baby and for the past couple of months, I was anticipating. But what do we know, God has other plans for us. I thought, if couples do it, then definitely baby will come but now, I am rather shocked that this is not the case all the time. Pristine was a surprise - when I thought I could not get pregnant six years ago I did and now that I am expecting to fall pregnant, I’m not.

Life is interesting.  

I had been so busy with work since last Saturday which means it was nearly impossible to go online in the office. When I do, I only check emails and moderate comments in my other blog.

I had so much in my mind for blog posts but they simply vanished away - next time, I’m going to write any thoughts I have on paper so I won’t forget!

I am slacking with this blog but it’s ok. I am declaring that it’s ok. After all, this is my “blog with no pressure” blog. No target audience, just about little updates of my life and my babe.

I dreamed about Hugh Jackman last night! And I overslept. Very strange because I did not even see any of his movies lately nor saw him in the news - oh wait, he was just proclaimed Sexiest Man Alive by People Magazine so that must be the reason of my *ahem* fantasy.

Anyway, we were lovey-dovey in my dreams. Oh, sweet, sweet dreams are made of these! Thank God for dreams.

I overslept because, uhm  honey, how can someone want to wake up if they have Hugh Jackman in their arms, in their dreams!?

*****

Hugh blah aside, my day just got better and better. I won dinner for two voucher at a restaurant in Grand Hyatt Hotel. Then my name will be placed in the hat to win a three days trip to Singapore on Christmas. Exciting, I know!

And my luck did not stop there, after an hour, I won a DVD copy of Mamma Mia (and my name was put into the draw to win a grand prize of a Karaoke system)!

* all contests I participated in the radio *

When Mamma Mia came out in DVD, I thought of winning it (I won an Indiana Jones 4 DVD a couple of weeks back) on the radio but wasn’t able to help myself and bought it. Now, I won it so I would be giving it to my sister.

What a great day today and this is all because of Hugh. :-) 

It’s my birthday today and I will be 32. A lot has happened in these 32 years of my life. Sounds like I’m going to have a melodrama starting but yeah, I have thought about some things like what I’ve gone through and boring things like how I see myself in the future - in the near future, like in eight years when I’ll be forty. haha

I don’t believe in milestones… that in a certain age we are required to accomplish something or be at a certain point in life. At thirty two, I am pretty much contented with what I have and have come to terms with what I don’t. I tend to count my blessings more instead of dwelling on the past mistakes and things that make me unhappy. I have learned that happiness is a decision, not a state and I am happier now.

Hubby is caught up with work and we couldn’t celebrate my birthday at home. I think this is the first time since we got married that we didn’t celebrate my birthday. And I’m not talking about a grand party - just three of us together is enough. What happened was a friend invited me to his son’s birthday so Pristine and I went. If I can’t celebrate my birthday then at least I can celebrate someone’s birthday, right?

Pristine enjoyed the children’s party so much and I am glad we went. Am I sad having no cake and no candles to blow this year? Honestly, no because I thought, birthdays are not all about cakes and candles, it is all about our celebration of life - being thankful for another year and I have lots to be thankful for.

Just like I planned yesterday, I stayed at home today. Pristine is still having fever and clingy to me but having a pretty good appetite and vibrant spirit.

We watched Mamma Mia the movie for at least five times today! The movie is just the best, the most entertaining movie for her right now. It beats all the Disney cartoons she knows. Pristine loves music, singing and dancing so this movie is a big hit in our house.

Being at home and having some quiet time for myself whenever she sleeps, I thought, so this is how stay at home moms would feel everyday. I felt fulfilled and at peace without having to wake up in the morning to dress up for work, bid my daughter goodbye and think of her when she is sick. I love what I am feeling today. I am a little bit tired caring for a sick child but I don’t mind, this is what moms do naturally. She needs me and I love the feeling that she needs me.

No mom could get too much kisses and hugs in a day, right?